Bitter Banker

I work for a company that still does loans, even "in this economy," which in it's self is shocking to some people. Many financial institutions have stopped lending or have super duper hard hoops to jump through in order to get a loan, but not us. I'm proud that we can still lend to people, I'm happy to help people get a new car, home, or consolidate debt. We aren't always able to help, but we do the very best we can, and here is where I run into trouble.

For the people we can help, you would think they would be uber grateful and do whatever little we ask with no questions but you would be sorely mistaken. You see, in a debt consolidation I can ask you to bring in the statements for the accounts you wish to pay off and people will stare at me like I am an alien sent to destroy them. And if I press on to my second request of a pay stub, you'd think I cut off their right hand. To me, these are two very simple things that you should perhaps have on hand when asking someone if you can borrow money (ya know proof of income and payoff information). People are so resistant to do anything, they want things simply handed to them. Seriously, I offend at least one person a week when I write a check out directly to their credit card instead of give them cash. But if you're paying off the credit card why would you be upset about mailing them a check? And pay stubs, how hard is it to get a pay stub? Every person who comes in here tells me they don't get a pay stub anymore. Heck, I don't get handed a pay stub anymore but I can go online and print one. Just go to your human resources and ask them how to get a pay stub, they can probably walk you through it. Just give me what I ask for, it's never anything too complicated. And a thank you every now and then wouldn't hurt either...

Of course the flip side of being able to lend is that I often have to tell people they can't have a loan. This sucks so much worse than you could possibly imagine. So, let me start by saying a few things: 1. I have to apply for a loan also, if I need one, they are not automatically given to me. So I do know how you feel, how "annoying" it is to bring in a pay stub (Hello, I work here but I still have to have one), and sit on that side of the desk, so please stop assuming I don't know how you feel. 2. If I could I'd give money away, but that life doesn't work that way. There's not a money tree or a magic money fairy, you have to qualify for a loan. 3. I'm not personally attacking you or your character when I deny a loan. I think that's about it for the need to know list. There are a lot of reasons for denying a loan, but I can tell you without taking an application that there are things that will automatically disqualify you from obtaining money from ANY financial institutions. Take note people, there is a quiz later. If you are currently behind on a loan or credit card with the place you're applying for a loan, if you have a checking account with a negative balance, if your mortgage loan is currently past due (meaning you don't pay for your house, the roof over your head...why on earth would you pay us for any money you borrow), if you are unemployed (and I shouldn't even have to type that but people actually apply for a loan with NO income-how are you going to pay back the loan with NO income), you won't get a loan.

And I don't think I can tolerate one more argument about why someones loans are not really past due on their credit report even though they look that way. "I'm not actually two months behind, I'm on a payment plan" translates to "you are past due but the nice people aren't taking you to court and instead are letting you pay a smaller amount in hopes of getting your current debt with them paid off" it's not a current account. Is that hard to understand? Or if I explain that you currently have too much debt, that in fact all of your monthly income actually already goes toward different debts and you simply can't afford another, don't argue with me for 20 minutes about how you know you can. You CANNOT afford it, believe me. It's not let's make a deal people, numbers don't lie...unless you're talking about tax returns. If one more person explains that their tax return doesn't really represent how much money they make, seriously I'm calling the IRS because I'm pretty sure that's tax evasion and illegal.

I think I'm just done with ungrateful, selfish, stupid people. They drive me crazy. I don't ask for the impossible, so in turn please don't ask me for the impossible. And when I can help, don't be a tool, bring me what I ask for.