Reflection

My life is wonderful, perfect for me husband, great family, stable job, roof over my head, everything a person could want. When I look back at the journey that got me here, I'm proud. Proud of the decisions I made, proud of the ones I refused, and even thankful for the horrible stuff that made the person I am today. I often wonder if I've lost some of me over the years. Not my core beliefs or anything like that, but the fun/carefree me. I'm quicker to snap, get cranky and angry. I've always been bitter, but I used to have a lot more tolerance for people. I still have compassion but people just get under my skin. I hear about a lot of people's problems every day and I think my skin has just gotten really thick. I don't want to be this angry, tired, mopey person. It's weird, people will ask me what I've been doing or what's new in my life and all I have to offer right now is a litany of complaints about people, my job, etc. Where did the joy go? The love of life? What am I doing that makes it all so dark and depressing. I'm not this person. I've lost me somehow in the shuffle of "living life" of going to work and coming home and eating dinner and staring mindlessly at the TV. The outside world is a stranger, the confines of my office and my house have become my safety net. I'm super lazy right now and I'm not even sure when it happened. So, I'm gonna snap out of it. I'm tired of it. I'm so done with it. I'm going back to being me. Still bitter but hopefully happier...